PEOPLE WHO KNOCK ME OUT

Jane Goodall
(see sidebar for others)

Stepping away for a moment from the endless talk of war and killing and greed and fear that is now part of our everyday world thanks to the media and politicians and corporate entities, I’m thinking about the simple, friendly, gentle life of one woman who found her calling early and followed it into graceful old age where she is still working for the health of one species of creature on our doomed planet. I went with my grandchildren a few months ago to see an Imax film of Jane Goodall returning to visit her original site of study in the Gombe Stream Game Reserve on Lake Tanganyika in Africa. There were clips of her walks in the forest as a young woman in her 20′s, and as she walked these same paths in her 60′s you could hardly tell the difference – the same graceful, slender, pretty, pony-tailed woman moving quietly through the trees. Over the years she has married twice, had one child, and devoted her life to raising awareness for wildlife research and conservation. In a little autobiographical piece I have, she says: From the time I was very small I had this love of animals, including insects and all natural life. My mother always supported and encouraged this interest. For example, when my mother found a whole handful of earthworms in bed with me, she didn’t say, “Yuck,” and throw them out. She just said that if I left them there, they’d be dead in the morning. They needed the earth. So I ran with them into the garden.” It’s like parallel worlds – stepping into that garden while somewhere out there bombs are falling on more of this earth and its inhabitants.

Deep Thought: “The tiger can’t change his spots. No, wait, he did! Good for him!
Today I am grateful for: Hartz Help! Stay Off Training Aid and if you don’t know what that is you don’t have pets.
Guess the Movie: “Oh, it’s nobody’s fault but my own! I was looking up… it was the nearest thing to heaven! You were there… ” Answer: An Affair to Remember, 1957. Winner: thenarrator.
Polls Today: Kerry 283/Bush 246 EVP: “It was bound to happen and it happened. Today we have more state polls than there are states. There are 54 new polls in 22 states today. Furthermore, the lead has changed in five states, and all five changes favor Kerry. As a result, Kerry has now passed Bush in the electoral college. If today’s results are the final results Wednesday morning, John Kerry will be elected as the 44th President of the United States, with 283 votes in the electoral college to George Bush’s 246. But don’t count on it. Many of Kerry’s leads are razor thin. Counting only the strong + weak states, Bush leads 229 to 196, with 113 electoral votes in the tossup category Kerry’s leads in the tossup states mean little to nothing. The turnout Tuesday will determine who wins.”
Don’t forget to set your clocks back. And for god’s sake, vote!
End of Day: 9:13 pm.
+ = Did a little early Xmas shopping.
- = Stitches in my mouth are coming loose and hanging between my teeth like spinach.

SATURDAY POEM I ADMIRE

Centcom Briefings Sonnets
#1 (in progress) – entered Iraq to remove the regime.
There is much pain there. Across the vastnesses
the coalition remains robust, with 49 countries
between us, small birds carry messages. The sky,
supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. We continue
wanting, above all, to be blue, to remember those who
have attacked regime targets over the last 48 hours
in Baghdad and several cities throughout the country,
as everlasting fire pours through space. Men dying in
precision attacks against surface-to-surface missiles
as Republican Guard forces return, to feed them, bear
their children, This is a strike against an Iraqi television
service building in Karbala, and it was attacked two nights ago.
This is a Ba’ath Party headquarters building in al-Hillah.
This is a military headquarters building in western Iraq.
A little too much beauty is so hard to bear–a fuel truck
in a revetement near al Kut, an ammo truck near An Najaf,
targets of opportunity, as this next video shows.
#2
The first and final image is of an ammo dump near Baghdad,
which illustrates our approach to reviving the Iraqi economy
by planting trees all around, using the combined waters
of Lake Huron, Lake Superior, and Babylon to flourish them.
Where centuries twist toward the light, and special operations
forces have also been effective interdicting movements into
or out of Iraq, single-purpose vehicles wheel along at a nice clip.
There is no future for the regime or anyone who supports it.
We’ve made that statement clearly a number of times, and we’ll
continue to say it. We’d be happy to guarantee that they have no
future. Will they fight to the death? Probably. We’re seeing that
in a number of places. Alarms have passed. The sun travels on.
Those who are indeed in the open have everything to lose
and will lose it. It’s better to err on the safe side and destroy them
than to do otherwise. We want to ensure that no capability can
come up, especially from western airfields. They were in the open
and they were attacked, and the trees often vary in both color
and substance. Flame more or less comes and goes.
#3
Ground truthing by Centcom has now suggested that both
the Tigris River and Euphrates River basins can be rendered
suitable Chinook salmon spawning habitats once sediment
sizes larger than fines can no longer adversely affect sac fry
emergence. Still, we continue to see brutal acts by the regime
and the forces loyal to it. One example comes from an outpost
in front of 1st Marine Expeditionary Force a day ago. And the
story goes like this. During the daylight hours, two vehicles
approaching a psychological checkpoint were taken under fire
when they failed to stop. At the same time, our maritime guys
continuing their work of keeping open the waterways found
some mines in the shallow waters of Khor Abdullah as they
continued expanding the channel way. Those mines have been
destroyed, making the salmon stocking project a definite go.
The maritime component continues to search any vessels
remaining to ensure that there are no threats. Dangerous work,
but important work, and it’s necessary to ensure that anything
that’s in the ports is safe. Okay, ladies and gentlemen, thank you.
Halvard Johnson. Bio

Deep Thought: “At first I thought a good way to get people to dig you some flower beds for free would be to call the police and say you buried some bodies in your backyard. But here’s the catch: they dig everywhere, not just where you tell them to. “
Today I am grateful for: Shoulder blades
Guess the Movie: “”It’s been 84 years, and I can still smell the fresh paint. The china had never been used, the sheets had never been slept in…” Answer: Titanic, 1997. Winner: strawberry14
Polls Today: Kerry 243/Bush 280. EVP: “Currently Bush leads slightly with 218 votes in the electoral college. Kerry has 191, and 129 are up for grabs. It could go either way.
End of Day: 9:54 pm
+ = Watching dynamite video, Control Room, re Iraq War from Iraq’s point of view – must see.
- = Sick to hear Kerry talking the same “we will kill, crush, maim, ruin, etc .etc. Bin Laden and all terrorists and I think I’ll just go throw up before I go to bed.

FRIDAY FIVE

1. what did you want to be when you grew up and why?
I don’t remember having a great passion to be a certain thing when I grew up. I lived in a total fantasy world on a farm reading Oz books. Once I got all the way to college I picked elementary education for a major because at the time it seemed like teaching and nursing were the most reliable jobs for women but I’m not sure that wasn’t my parents’ idea. I’ve always wished I could have been one of those people who know right from the gate and spend their whole lives doing that one thing.
2. who was your favorite person to do things with (excluding your parents)?
My only choice was my younger male cousin by a couple of years who also lived on the farm. Together we created various havoc, but once I left home I left him behind too and completely lost touch.
3. did you love school or did you hate it? Why? Did that change as you got older?
It was always problematic. There was huge pressure from my dad mainly to perform at a high level. And the social stuff was excruciating. But I do feel grateful for all the higher (and lower) learning that crusted all over me so I can understand the world better in some small way.
4. was your family close? What were your favorite family traditions?
There were just 4 of us in my house. The dynamic duo, dad and mom, were always working it out, but they stayed together till the end. Dad could not abide Grandpa (mom’s dad) and vice versa. Mealtimes were prickly. Mom knocked herself out on holidays, right down to painting pine cones by hand. No big traditions other than major holidays though that I can remember.
5. did you think that being an adult would be cool?
My dad would always say to me in an argument, “you won’t understand until you get to be as old as I am,” and I never did (at the same time anyway). And I still don’t understand.

“Life is a constant battle between the heart and the brain. But guess who wins. The skeleton.
Today I am grateful for: The chance to begin again
Guess the Movie: “You can’t handle the truth!” Answer: A Few Good Men, 1992. Winner: rideuponthewind.
Polls Today: Kerry 236/Bush 281. EVP: “Another bumper crop of polls, 36 of them in 17 states to be exact. And as usual, the bottom line is that it is still a statistical tie.”
End of Day: 8:40 pm
+ = I went back to Jiffy Lube today and stood up for myself by pointing out that they talked me into a $50 engine flush based upon totally wrong mileage and they actually refunded the money.
- = It took up a whole hour of my day.

THURSDAY WHATEVER

Glimmers of Hope

In the midst of this very stressful last few days for us all, wondering if the last few damn voters are going to make it to the polls to save us from a dark future, a moment of Zen comes, as they would say on the Jon Stewart show. If you didn’t catch the “debate” between Stewart and hosts Tucker Carlson and Paul Begala on their show Crossfire a few weeks ago, clips of it can be found all over the internet and I’ll include some links here to the video and the transcript. Needless to say, our man who walks on water in my book anyway more than held up his end of the tussle. It’s been my observation that most of the rightwing talk show hosts like Bill O’Reilly for example, debate by simply interrupting and shouting down opponents – like those arrogant SUV owners who always pull into a parking place and manage to take up two so you can’t get your little fuel economy car into the space next to the one they’re supposed to be in. For those of us little folks, to hear someone use simple wit and intelligence and humor in a discussion and WIN is heavenly. Here’s a tiny bit of the transcript that I enjoyed:
CARLSON: You had John Kerry on your show and you sniff his throne and you’re accusing us of partisan hackery?
STEWART: Absolutely.
CARLSON: You’ve got to be kidding me. He comes on and you…
(CROSSTALK)
STEWART: You’re on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls.
(LAUGHTER)
STEWART: What is wrong with you?
(APPLAUSE) CARLSON: Well, I’m just saying, there’s no reason for you — when you have this marvelous opportunity not to be the guy’s butt boy, to go ahead and be his butt boy. Come on. It’s embarrassing.
STEWART: I was absolutely his butt boy. I was so far — you would not believe what he ate two weeks ago.
(LAUGHTER)
(CROSSTALK)
STEWART: You know, the interesting thing I have is, you have a responsibility to the public discourse, and you fail miserably.
CARLSON: You need to get a job at a journalism school, I think.
STEWART: You need to go to one.
The thing that I want to say is, when you have people on for just knee-jerk, reactionary talk…
CARLSON: Wait. I thought you were going to be funny. Come on. Be funny.
STEWART: No. No. I’m not going to be your monkey.
So wherever you are, when you’re feeling low or hopeless or fearful or sad or just plain freaked out today, just say to yourself “No. I’m not going to be your monkey,” and I guarantee you’ll get your parking space.

“You know what would be the most terrifying thing that could ever happen to a flea? Getting caught inside a watch somehow. You don’t even care, do you. “
Today I am grateful for: Monkey Mind
Guess the Movie: “Lunch is for wimps. ” Answer: Wall Street, 1987. Winner: mjh.
Polls Today: Kerry 260/Bush 254. EVP: “Today’s harvest is 39 polls in 18 states. In most states the winner didn’t change, but we have motion in two key states. The most recent poll in Ohio, Zogby’s tracking poll, puts Kerry a tad ahead there, 46% to 45%, well within the margin of error. Other Ohio polls are mixed. Rasmussen’s tracking poll puts Bush 4% ahead but the LA Times poll puts Kerry 4% ahead. Let’s call Ohio a tie. Which way it goes will almost assuredly depend on the turnout Tuesday, especially among younger voters. Could OSU elect the next president? It is not out of the question.

The other state where we have a change is Michigan. According to the latest poll there (Zogby’s tracking poll) Bush and Kerry are tied at 47% each. However, two other polls (Rasmussen and Mitchell Research put Kerry ahead by 6% and 1%, respectively). All in all, by gaining Ohio and having Michigan be tied, Kerry makes a net gain and now leads in the electoral college, but neither candidate has the required 270 electoral votes it takes to win.”
End of Day: 8:41 pm.
+ = Finally got my car through the Jiffy Lube.
- = I think they ripped me off.

WEDNESDAY MOVIE(S)

Coming of Age

As a film addict who uses this media as an escape from the mundane crap of daily life, I’d rather (as my sidebar says) watch an intriguing serial killer movie any day than foreign films, especially about adolescence. But some weeks there’s nothing else left on the shelves and for that fortunate reason I discovered 3 films that overcame my resistance and gave me their gift. They are:
I’m Not Scared (Italian)
Young boy in peasant family stumbles upon Really Big Scary Family Secret and has to make a courageous choice.
Spring Summer Fall Winter and Spring (Korean)
Young boy grows up like Grasshopper in isolation with wise old monk, is drawn away by the voodoo call of the World, returns finally to become the monk’s replacement after learning more than he ever wanted to know.
The Return (Russian)
Two young boys are reunited with the father who deserted them years earlier and go on a mysterious journey during which they learn the hard way how to survive pretty much anywhere.
Take a chance, try any one of these and you’ll find out why foreign films almost always get better ratings than American films. The photography is always top notch, the scripts are excellent, and the acting is big league. And let me know if you’ve heard of any good new serial killer films.

Deep Thought: “We’re all afraid of something. Take my little nephew, for instance. He’s afraid of skeletons. He thinks they live in closets and under beds, and at night they come out to get you when you’re asleep. And what am I afraid of? Now, I’m afraid of skeletons. “
Today I am grateful for: Novocaine
Guess the Movie: “Look, you don’t know me from Adam. But I was a better man with you as a woman than I ever was with a woman as a man. Know what I mean?” Answer: Tootsie, 1982.Winner: thenarrator.
Polls Today: Kerry 257/Bush 274. EVP: “The Los Angeles Times has a story today that explains why this election is so much more emotionally charged than previous ones. It is not about economics, but part of a cultural war. A new LA Times poll shows Bush doing well among lower and middle income whites, whereas Kerry leads among whites earning more than $100,000 a year despite his promise to roll back the Bush tax cuts for people making more than $200,000 a year. As president, Bush has enacted big tax cuts for the rich but the rich are voting for Kerry. What’s up here? The same poll shows that 2/3 of the people who attend a house of worship at least once a week are voting for Bush, whereas 60% of those who attend religious services less than once a week are voting for Kerry, in part because these voters recoil at Bush’s constant use of religious imagery. Lower income whites like Bush’s proposal to ban gay marriage but only a quarter believe his policies have been good for the economy. In contrast, affluent whites who have benefitted the most from the Bush tax cuts believe Bush’s policies have hurt the economy. In short, far more than in previous years, economic policy is taking a back seat to cultural issues. The real divide seems to be between deeply religious lower income, lower education, voters living in small towns and rural areas who have conservative values on abortion and gay marriage versus higher income, higher education, secular, urban voters who have progressive views on cultural issues. Maybe James Carville was wrong: It’s NOT the economy, stupid. With this background and the fact that eight of the nine Supreme Court justices are past the traditional retirement age of 65 and four of them have been treated for cancer, it is likely that the choice of who the next president will nominate to the Court will weigh increasingly heavily on the minds of many voters as we approach election day.”
End of Day: 9:37 pm
+ = 39 years ago today my daughter Jane was born in San Francisco and it was a good day.
- = Hard time in the dentist’s chair this morning getting my gums cut up but spent the rest of the day resting up and really no discomfort once the novocaine wore off thank god.

TUESDAY POLITICS

October Surprise

All along I’ve been wondering if the Bush folks would pull Bin Laden out of a hat at the last minute. Looks like whether they do or not there are a couple of surprises nobody planned: namely the Big Bang coming to a neighborhood possibly near you because of those missing explosives, and then the illness of Judge Rehnquist raising the specter of all those rights we’ve fought for being erased by whomever might replace him should he have to step down. And here we are in the very last week before Election Day and it still looks like a total squeaker in spite of all the crucial issues involved. Here’s an article from my hometown paper.

“It’s easy to sit there and say you’d like to have more money. And I guess that’s what I like about it. It’s easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money. “
Today I am grateful for: Not having to ride the bus to work
Guess the Movie: “Well, judgin’ from his tracks, he’s about six and a half feet tall. He eats raw squirrels and all the cats he can catch. There’s a long, jagged scar that runs all the way across his face. His teeth are yella and rotten. His eyes are popped. And he drools most of the time.” Answer: To Kill A Mockingbird, 1962.
Polls Today: No change from yesterday. EVP: “Supreme Court news: Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist, 80, has thyroid cancer and had an emergency tracheotomy at Bethesda Naval Hospital according to a report in today’s Washington Post. Thyroid cancer has several forms, but all are difficult to treat in older patients according to medical experts. Rehnquist is not the only member of the Court to have been diagnosed with cancer. Ruth Bader Ginsburg, 71, had colon cancer, Sandra Day O”Conner, 74, had breast cancer, and John Paul Stevens, 84, had prostate cancer. This latest occurence of cancer once again spotlights the age of the current justices and the fact that the next president is almost certainly going to have multiple vacancies to fill, probably including the Chief Justice. With respect to judicial apppointments, it is harder to imagine two candidates whose judicial appointments would differ more than Bush and Kerry’s. Will the next president appoint Justices determined to reverse Roe v. Wade or to reaffirm it? What about teaching of creationism in schools, separation of church and state, medical research using stem cells, and so many other issues on which the candidates differ? Ultimately, practically all of them end up in the Supreme Court. Ten years from now the war in Iraq will be over (hopefully), but the justices the next president appoints will still be on the Court making decisions that affect many aspects of life in America. Think carefully about this issue before voting next Tuesday.”
End of Day: 8:01 pm
+ = Found out there won’t be any changes to my job right away – timeline hasn’t even been set yet to turn web pages over to outside vendor.
- = Tomorrow morning have to get crown lengthening surgery done on two teeth which will probably take 2 hours and the dentist is crabby, so think of me.

MONDAY BOOK

How We Die
Sherwin B. Nuland

Well, one glance at this topic and most xangans will probably skip merrily on to the next blog on their daily route, but in keeping with the book Grace and Grit I’ve been reading lately about a death from breast cancer and yesterday’s blog from brendaclews about death from the perspective of a funeral home, I thought I would share a few paragraphs from one of the few books I actually own on this subject. I bought the book years ago after two of my female relatives, my mother and an aunt, died, both essentially from stroke. I had spent time at their bedsides observing the process in people so close to me, and it was a truly devastating experience. I wanted to understand better what I’d seen happening in front of my eyes. This book describes the details of how it is to die from some of the most significant causes today and you’ve probably had at least someone in your own family die from one of them in your lifetime with more to come. They are: heart attack, alzheimer’s, AIDS, cancer, “old age” stroke, murder, accidents, suicide, and euthanasia. Death is a taboo subject in our culture, especially among the young (anyone under 60) who are bulletproof and blindered. However, as one grows older it becomes more of interest to know what is to come, not just the bad part, but how to approach that transition with as much dignity and meaning as possible. To quote brendaclews, “Life is not learning how to die.  For the simple reason that one cannot die unless one has lived.  Your death is proof that you lived.  Nothing more.” However, Sherwin Nuland adds in the last paragraphs of his book:
“And so, if the classic image of dying with dignity must be modified or discarded, what is to be salvaged of our hope for the final memories we leave to those who love us? The dignity that we seek in dying must be found in the dignity with which we have lived our lives. The honesty and grace of the years of life that are ending is the real measure of how we die. It is not in the last weeks or days that we compose the message that will be remembered, but in all the decades that preceded them.”

Deep Thought: I remember the first time I ever went to the museum and saw the mummy. At first I was afraid of it. So, to get over my fear, I started pointing at the mummy and doing a funny little dance. But then I couldn’t stop doing the dance. Something made me dance faster and faster until finally I fell on the floor. Even then I couldn’t stop doing the dance. I flailed about helplessly, yelling some weird Egyptian words! Then I think I passed out, from hitting my head on the marble floor. Now, I’m happy to say, I’m no longer afraid of the mummy, mainly because I don’t go there anymore.
Today I am grateful for: Foresight
Guess the Movie: “Loneliness has followed me my whole life, everywhere. In bars, in cars, sidewalks, stores, everywhere. There’s no escape. I’m God’s lonely man.” Answer: Taxi Driver, 1976.
Polls Today: Kerry 247/Bush 285. EVP: “Don’t like Bush or Kerry or Nader or Badnarik or Cobb or any of the others? Maybe YOU should be president. Simcountry is a multiplayer Internet game in which you are the president, commander in chief and industrial leader. You decide how to allocate the federal budget, which products to manufacture, where to build schools and infrastructure, and which countries you want to invade. If you can beat the other presidents, you can win cash awards.Playing the game is free, but be warned, it is addictive.”
End of Day: 8:58 pm
+ = Watched an exquisite video today – Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter – and Spring – out now at your local video store.
- = Had to deal with slimy bank brokers today and just felt awful afterwards like I’d swallowed a big barrel of toxic poison.

PEOPLE WHO KNOCK ME OUT
(for others see sidebar)

Jane Fonda

She’s 67 now and I’ve been following her journey with admiration for some 40 years. Besides speaking up against the war in Vietnam and taking never-ending flak for it, she also married Tom Hayden and supported his career financially, and for her third choice in husbands (first was Roger Vadim – French director) took on Ted Turner, liberal media mogul. She has never been afraid to contend, but while she was at it she just managed to win 6 Golden Globes, 2 Academy Awards (one for Coming Home – now there was an anti-war movie to die for), and an Emmy. From a famous film family and a Vassar graduate, she was also flexible, becoming an exercise icon in the early ’80′s and starting the video fitness craze. And all the way along, she looked Fabulous. I hear she’s become a born-again Christian (details of which should be fascinating). I’m afraid I can’t follow her there, but she will be a forever role model among my peers for her moxie and take-it-on-the-chin integrity.

Deep Thought: “Just as bees will swarm about to protect their nest, so will I “swarm about” to protect my nest of chocolate eggs. “
Today I am grateful for: Nest eggs
Guess the Movie: “I was just reciting the Shepard’s Prayer. Alan Shepard’s prayer. Please God, don’t let us screw up. Amen. ” Answer: Space Cowboys, 2000.
Polls Today: Kerry 253/Bush 254. EVP: “There are 18 new polls today, mostly in battleground states, but no states switched sides there. However, a change comes from a most unlikely location. A new poll in Hawaii shows the race is tied there. If it is really true, this is very bad news for Kerry. He was supposed to win easily there. Of course he could fly out there this week for some much needed vacation time and call it campaigning, but I doubt that he will. As a result of Hawaii becoming a tie, Bush now takes the lead in the electoral college, 254 to 253. Talk about a tight race where every vote counts.”
End of Day: 9:06 pm
+ = Clinton is back on the campaign trail and I sure hope it helps.
- = Finally getting too cold to enjoy yardwork.

SATURDAY POEM I ADMIRE

almond trees

The pink is drained from the dusk.
One feels the valley blue, as much as sees.
Body senses waken for the night.
Driving through the gauntlet of blooming almond trees,
White in the dark, the heart wins out. Tears are purged
For a country perversely bent to war.

Michael Irwin, 62, acupuncturist, teacher, Poet Against the War

Deep Thought: I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Cave Man the best. We called him Uncle Cave Man because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he’d eat one of us. Later on we found out he was a bear.
Today I am grateful for: Swing voters
Guess the Movie: “What difference does it make where you buy underwear? Underwear! Underwear is Underwear! It’s Underwear wherever you buy it! In Cincinnati or Wherever! Answer: Rain Man, 1988.
Polls Today: Kerry 257/Bush 254. EVP: “
Florida can’t make up its collective mind. It’s tied again. A new Insider Advantage poll puts the race there dead even, with Bush and Kerry each getting 46%. As a result, Kerry edges ahead nationally again, with 257 votes in the electoral college to Bush’s 254. However, if we look at the strong+weak totals for each candidate, Bush leads 209 to 205, with 124 really too close to call. According to the latest polls, these are Florida, Iowa, Minnesota, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, and Pennsylvania. However, in my judgement based on a number of recent polls rather than just the last one, Kerry will win New Jersey, New Mexico, and Pennsylvania. The others are true tossups. None are relative safe for Bush. If we count these three as Kerry wins, the “hard” totals are Kerry 246, Bush 209, still a tossup.”
End of Day: 9:49 pm
+ = Got a great photo of a darkroom from someone today that inspires me to keep at having one myself.
- = I hate addiction.

FRIDAY FIVE
1. Last time you smiled:
I could write a whole metaphysical chapter on smiling as the story of my life, but the idea of doing that makes me smile.
2. First time you can remember being proud of yourself:
Lying on the floor in the living room of my house at about age 4 writing my ABC’s. And I could write a whole metaphysical chapter on writing, too.
3. Last time you lied:
Yesterday, when I lied by omission and told the salesgirl who sat in my living room trying to sell me windows for $9000 for my house that I’d consider it. I could buy two cars for that. Hell, 3 cars.
4. First time you felt true sadness:
What pops to mind is when my grandfather put the newborn kittens on the farm in a gunny sack and took them to the river to drown them. If I could have moved away from home that day I would have, but I was only 8.
5. Last time you you made a tough decision:
Tuesday when I realized they’re going to phase out the web pages I’ve spent 8 years on at work. I realize I’m going to have to think about transferring laterally to some other job at my huge employer. Out with the old and in with the new. Though I’ll have to be very, very careful. A job is precious in today’s economy.

Deep Thought: If you’re a circus clown, and you have a dog that you use in your act, I don’t think it’s a good idea to also dress the dog up like a clown, because people see that and they think, “Forgive me, but that’s just too much.”
Today I am grateful for: My poky old Mac that forces me to be beatific.
Guess the Movie: “It lies to her. It tells her things only a child can understand. To her, it simply is another child. To us, it is The Beast. ” Answer: Poltergeist, 1982. Winner: liviatasia
Polls Today: Kerry 264/Bush 264. EVP: “The seesaw keeps going up and down. Yesterday, Bush was ahead in Ohio and behind in Florida. Today he is behind in Ohio and ahead in Florida. A new Quinnipiac Univ. poll in Florida puts Bush a whisker ahead there, 45% to 43% among registered voters and 48% to 47% among Quinnipiac’s idea of likely voters, both well within the margin of error. A new Gallup poll in Ohio puts Kerry ahead there, 50% to 44 among registered voters, but only ahead 48% to 47% among those people Gallup considers likely voters. Given that the presidency is likely to be determined by a few thousand Florida and Ohio voters, it is somehow hard to imagine that vast numbers of registered voters in those two states are going to sit this one out though. The electoral college is now tied at 264 votes each, with Minnesota being an exact tie. It is going to be a real squeaker. Every vote is going to count in a large number of states this time.” And my Oregon has slipped back to being Barely Kerry again. Ouch, that smarts.
End of Day: 8:38 pm
+ = So nice to hear all your support for my job situation and luckily I don’t have to make a sudden move but can be careful about it.
- = What is this freaking Sinclair movie thing that’s supposed to be showing tonight?