fridayfiver
1. When you are getting ready to leave your home, what are three things you always do?
Turn off the lights. Make sure the back door is locked. Bring a housekey with me.
2. What is the most annoying habit that you have?
Probably transmitting judgmentalism and only being dimly aware of it. But since I’m only dimly aware I’m not sure.
3. If you could develop a new habit, what would it be?
Smiling at everydamnbody I encounter all day. Even jerks.
4. Do you participate in any religious rituals?
I’m judgmental of religion. I do have some spiritual rituals.
5. Describe one custom that is unique to your community or culture.
One custom unique to the Recovery community is knowing the Serenity Prayer by heart.
Deep Thought: Instead of half-mast, maybe you could fly a flag at three-quarter-mast for a guy who’s in a coma. Then, if he gets worse, the flag gets lower, or if he gets better, it starts to move up, so you can just look at the flag and see how he’s doing.
Today I am grateful for: Mapquest
Guess the Movie: “Now, where was I?” Answer: Memento, 2000
End of Day: 9:13 pm
+ = Completion of second root canal was successful. Didn’t have to have tooth pulled. At least not today.
- = The whole experience was stressful as hell. Back on another course of antibiotics and my cheek hurts.

The Stones of Summer
(but first, check out this poem by meemee925. Now THIS has some political punch!)
Since I watched the video The Stone Reader and learned about Dow Mossman who wrote one book that took him ten years, got great reviews, had a nervous breakdown and was never heard from again until the filmmaker tracked him down, I’ve been reading The Stones of Summer to find out what all the noise was about. Well, I have to return it to the library after 3 weeks because it’s so much in demand and I’ve only gotten 100 pages done because it’s so dense with imagery that it’s like cutting your way through the jungle with a child’s scissors. The book is 581 pages long, so I guess when I check it out again (and I will as soon as humanly possible), it will take me till Christmas to get through it. I’m kind of surprised the author only had a nervous breakdown after writing it and didn’t just lay down and die. It’s a boy’s coming of age story as best I can make out and here’s just a paragraph of why it’s worth reading:
Dawes Williams and Traffic Cop still stared down into the round stone moon of the lane. Traffic Cop seemed to be nearly sleeping but Dawes felt like moving. The night was motionless, utterly still now, moving off, drying itself like a bone caught in a drift of trees. The old hound groaned slightly in his dreams beside him. He could hear Gin’s voice move along the ridge, calling him in. He wanted to be moving anyway, so he followed her voice down toward the lane. The night, too clear, shadowy with throated stones, mooned in the huts on the hill, remained behind. The greyhounds were moving down with him, around him. He could hear them. They split the grass. They left no sign. It was a dream. It was two dreams; ten; time and place and crystal light unwound through glass bent with prisms. Only the dogs were not nervous at all. The dogs ate grain and meat from tin pans, and wore only leather bracelets round their necks, and ran wild in the woods. They were softer raiders. They raised their curious heads and forgot it. They howled at the furious moon and went on home to sleep it off. The roof of the sky was a stuck clock, moving across, frozen on its hinges of air. The light in that prism spread out softly only so that it might converge again. Something was always missing. Just as you thought you had it it halved apart again in the crumbling wind. Time had no sequence. Time had no time. Place was a walking hill. They were the longest shadows of heaven. They rode beyond themselves, dreaming of light. All others died. She was dead. Grandma-great had died that winter, alone in her house, while he was away. All form withers and withdraws, becomes black in a trellis heavy with locusts, lost in a window of moon, a sieve of water funneling the sky, broken and trapped in a disintegrating wheel of the fields: black, lost, broken…
See what I mean. Makes you want to go take a nap. And dream . Stay tuned. I will return to this project later.
Deep Thought: Some folks say it was a miracle. St. Francis suddenly appeared and knocked the next pitch clean over the fence. Other folks say it was just a lucky swing.
Today I am grateful for: More than one side to a coin
Guess the Movie: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Answer: Love Story, 1970
Winner the narrator
End of Day – 8:26 pm
+ = Part of my morning meditation goes: May I awaken to the light of my own true nature. And I swear to god what with writing my story and listening to others here in Xanga I’m beginning to find my way back to that “true nature.” It’s exciting.
- = They let my granddaughter go to school today still sick with strep throat that she only started having symptoms of on Sunday because mom, dad, and stepdad all work. This is so typical of young families in today’s economy and it makes me crazy.

Coincidence?

AP: ‘U.S. death toll in Iraq passes 1,000 mark’ … 4:27
LINK
AP: ‘Ridge: Terrorists hope to disrupt election’ … 4:40
LINK
Deep Thought: Don’t ever get your speedometer confused with your clock, like I did once, because the faster you go the later you think you are.
Today I am grateful for: Not having strep throat like my granddaughter
Guess the Movie: “Oh, no! It wasn’t the airplanes. It was Beauty killed the Beast.” Answer: King Kong, 1933
Winner rideuponthewind
End of Day – 8:54 pm
+ = I got a new $15 optical mouse for my old Mac today. Oh frabjous day!
- = Back to back dental appointments tomorrow, nothing major, but then the big one will be Friday morning for the finish up of the remaining root canal.

Forget Vietnam – it’s the economy, Clinton tells Kerry

Suzanne Goldenberg in Washington
Tuesday September 7, 2004
The Guardian

John Kerry, alarmed by a post-convention surge in the opinion polls for President George Bush, relaunched his campaign yesterday after taking the advice of Bill Clinton from his hospital bed.

In a 90-minute conversation from hospital, Mr Clinton was reported yesterday to have sketched out a detailed strategy to revive Mr Kerry’s candidacy, warning him to tone down the emphasis on Vietnam and to re-focus on jobs and healthcare. Mr Kerry appeared to have adopted some of his suggestions, offering up a combative Labor Day speech in Pennsylvania yesterday.

“If you want four more years of your wages falling … if you want four more years of losing jobs overseas and replacing them with jobs that pay $9,000 [about £5,000] less than the jobs you had before, then you should go vote for George Bush,” he told a morning rally.

(Isn’t that typical Clinton to be campaigning from his hospital bed.) Today the Electoral Vote Polls stand at 237 Kerry/275 Bush and here’s what the Electoral Vote Predictor (see sidebar) has to say:

We have four new polls today, one of them significant. Bush and Kerry are now tied in Minnesota. This is bad news for Kerry. He should have been way ahead there. It is now clear that July was a good month for Kerry. He led the entire month. August has been a good month for Bush. He is definitely ahead now. No two ways about it. The other polls are in California, Michigan, and New Jersey, all of which still show Kerry in front.

Starting today we will track all 34 Senate races. The link on the More data page labeled “The 2004 Senate races” gives a commentary on the key races as well as a link to spreadsheets in both Excel and .csv format. They will be updated whenever new Senate polls come in. Please don’t ask for the House. There are 435 races there.

Here is a brief summary of the Senate races. The Democrats are defending open seats in five southern states: Florida, Georgia, Louisiana, North Carolina, and South Carolina due to the retirements of five southern Democratic senators. The Republicans are defending open seats in Colorado, Illinois, and Oklahoma due to the retirements of Republican Senators there. At the start of the year, almost every expert said the Democrats had no chance to recapture the Senate since they would have to win five seats in the South just to break even and pick up two Republican seats to boot. Looking at the polls, the situation is completely different now. The Republicans are ahead in Georgia and South Carolina and the Democrats are ahead in Colorado and Illinois, so these races cancel out. Florida and North Carolina are close, but the Democrats currently lead in both.

But there are two other key races to watch: Alaska and Louisiana. In Alaska, the incumbent, Lisa Murkowski, was appointed to her seat by her Dad, the governor of Alaska, a move not cheered by all Alaskans. Although she is the incumbent, she wasn’t elected and she is facing a popular two-term Democratic ex-governor, Tony Knowles. The polls put Knowles slightly ahead at the moment. This could be another Democratic pickup.

Louisiana is a strange kettle of (Cajun-style) fish. Senatorial elections there are nonpartisan and if nobody gets 50% of the vote on Nov. 2, there will be a runoff on a Saturday in early Dec. Currently, the only Republican in the race, David Vitter, has better poll numbers than the two major Democrats, Chris John and John Kennedy, combined, so the spreadsheet reflects this seat as a GOP win. But it is worth noting that both current senators are Democrats, as is the governor. Furthermore, Louisiana has never elected a Republican to the Senate in its entire history. Not once, ever. When it becomes a one-on-one race in the runoff, the Democrat always squeaks through.

Then there is Oklahoma, which is a highly Republican state with a highly flawed Republican senatorial candidate, Tom Coburn, who has advocated the death penalty for abortionists. Coming from a former obstetrician who has admitted to performing abortions himself, this kind of recklessness does not endear him to the Republican establishment. If he can get control of his mouth, he might still win, but it is far from a sure thing.

Counting Oklahoma and Louisiana as Republican, the spreadsheet says the new Senate will most likely be 51 Republicans and 49 Democrats (including Jeffords) But if I had to guess, I’d say 50-50 appears more plausible right now on account of Louisiana.

In any event, the Republican hope of a few months ago of picking up most of the open southern seats and increasing their majority in the Senate substantially is rapidly fading.
Deep Thought: Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
Today I am grateful for: Medicine
Guess the Movie: “I used to hate the water.”
“I can’t imagine why.” Answer: Jaws, 1975
Winner Leonidas
End of Day – 9:04 pm
+ = I”ve been meditating morning and night daily for about 2-1/2 weeks now and I truly believe it’s making a change in my serenity level.
- = Tonight may be the last night at my Tuesday night women’s talking circle for awhile. It’s just not working for me. Maybe it will again later on.

Monday Book Review
Grace and Grit (cont.)

Recapping, this is the story of Ken and Treya Wilber, each involved in the healing professions when they met and married. On a routine physical a month before their marriage, Treya discovered she had a particularly malignant form of breast cancer tumor. Deciding on segmental mastectomy followed by radiation they spent their honeymoon in the hospital having the surgery. Following this was the 5-1/2 weeks of radiation therapy. They decided to spend the following summer in Aspen, Colorado. Then an event occurred that had even more impact. Treya became pregnant. And here I learned a fact that I’ve never heard before about cancer. Because her tumor was estrogen positive, the hormonal shifts concomitant with being pregnant would act like fertilizer for any remaining cancer cells in the body. For this reason, abortion was necessary. They were told, however, that in about two years, if still free of cancer, they could start a family and so they bought a home in Lake Tahoe that fall, almost a year since they had first met. Tune in next week.
Deep Thought: I think a good product would be “Baby Duck Hat”. It’s a fake baby duck, which you strap on top of your head. Then you go swimming underwater until you find a mommy duck and her babies, and you join them. Then, all of a sudden, you stand up out of the water and roar like Godzilla. Man, those ducks really take off! Also, Baby Duck Hat is good for parties.
Today I am grateful for: Fonts
Guess the Movie: “Look, Daddy. Teacher says, every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings.”
“That’s right, that’s right. Attaboy, Clarence.” Answer: It’s A Wonderful Life
Winner Leonidas
End of Day – 8:43 pm
+ = Glad Clinton made it through surgery okay.
- = My granddaughter Sierra came up sick today with fever, headache, and chills. Scared me because I had meningitis as a kid with similar symptoms. However, Dad and Mom are going to wait and see.

THINGS THAT REFRESH MY SOUL
See sidebar for other segments

Zeal

Interestingly, when I googled for an image for this topic, it brought up mostly photos of motorcycles so I thought what the hell and posted my favorite. As for zeal, wouldn’t you know it’s from a Greek word originally, those same folks that invented Zeus and all the other old gods of the past. It means to have fervor for a person, cause or object. I noticed recently when I posted a report from one of the protestors at the Republican Convention (who I think could be called a zealot by the above definition) that there were a number of responses from folks who are very burned out on the political scene and opting to opt out. I don’t want to confine this little blurb to politics in relationship to zeal, but it’s not a bad analogy. I myself, compared to my beloved communist mother now dead, am probably a rather anemic example of political zeal but I do see the point of suiting up and showing up, even if you’re not sure how it will all turn out. Most of the really hideous events of history (like the concentration camps of World War II) had fertile breeding ground because so many people closed their doors and pulled the shades and turned off their ears. It was called fascism, what happened then, and I seem to hear the distant hum of that same cruel machine headed this way once more lurking behind the proud banner of patriotism. So on Sunday morning, I get down on my knees and thank god for zealots who step right out in front and tell us what they’re about so we can decide. And hopefully vote on it. And with that, I wind up this series of Things That Refresh My Soul. Goodness, what will I come up with next Sunday?
Deep Thought: “If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you’re in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don’t know what to tell you.”
Today I am grateful for: James Carville and Mary Matalin – husband and wife opposing views zealots
Guess the Movie: “I’ve wrestled with reality for thirty-five years, and I’m happy, Doctor, I finally won out over it.” Answer: Harvey, 1950
Winner thenarrator

End of Day – 9:08 pm
+ = Spent a peaceful sunny afternoon with my son and his family hiking and in the park.
- = Cats are as picky as people about the food they like.

SATURDAY POEM I ADMIRE

i sing of Olaf glad and big

i sing of Olaf glad and big
whose warmest heart recoiled at war:
a conscientious object-or

his wellbelovéd colonel(trig
westpointer most succinctly bred)
took erring Olaf soon in hand;
but–though an host of overjoyed
noncoms(first knocking on the head
him)do through icy waters roll
that helplessness which others stroke
with brushes recently employed
anent this muddy toiletbowl,
while kindred intellects evoke
allegiance per blunt instruments–
Olaf(being to all intents
a corpse and wanting any rag
upon what God unto him gave)
responds,without getting annoyed
“I will not kiss your fucking flag”

straightway the silver bird looked grave
(departing hurriedly to shave)

but–though all kinds of officers
(a yearning nation’s blueeyed pride)
their passive prey did kick and curse
until for wear their clarion
voices and boots were much the worse,
and egged the firstclassprivates on
his rectum wickedly to tease
by means of skilfully applied
bayonets roasted hot with heat–
Olaf(upon what were once knees)
does almost ceaselessly repeat
“there is some shit I will not eat”

our president,being of which
assertions duly notified
threw the yellowsonofabitch
into a dungeon,where he died

Christ(of His mercy infinite)
i pray to see;and Olaf,too

preponderatingly because
unless statistics lie he was
more brave than me:more blond than you.

ee cummings, 1931

---

I could have picked any one of a dozen Cummings poems, but chose this one because of our current state of affairs in the world. I was delighted when I discovered Cummings in my youth and found you could mess with punctuation and word order and capitalization and how a poem looks on the page. Apparently, lots of other folks were too, as he was the second most read poet in America after Robert Frost when he died in 1962. Like Whitman he was an ambulance driver in WWI, spent time as a POW, and was an in-your-face war protestor. We need these kind of voices now. BAD.
Deep Thought: Consider the daffodil. And while you’re doing that, I’ll be over here, looking through your stuff.
Today I am grateful for: Conscience
Guess the Movie: “When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants and murderers and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it. Always.” Answer: Gandhi, 1982
End of Day – 9:37 pm
+ = Just got home from an 18-year birthday meeting of a woman I sponsor in Recovery.
- = Kind of scary to hear about Clinton’s heart surgery. What a wake up call.

thefridayfive

1. What is your favorite summer activity?
Sitting on my back porch when the late afternoon/early evening hits a certain light that glows over my garden, watching and listening to the sounds that come only at that time. Thinking of all the special people in my life who are sitting there with me in spirit.
2. What was one great thing you did this summer?
Showed up for my granddaughter’s first baseball season and interacted with all the various family members on both sides of a divorced family.
3. When you were a child, what was your favorite summer activity?
Wandering all over the 100-acre farm I lived on alone keeping track of birds – from eggs in the nest, to babies leaving it, to bringing the nests home when they were empty for my collection.
4. What has been your favorite summer vacation?
Visiting the ocean with my long-gone parents and my children when they were young for an extended stay.
5. Summer goes well into September, but when do you feel like it is over?
When I begin to light fires in the fireplace again because Oregon has reverted to its wet gray winter self on an every-day-of-the-week basis.
Deep Thought: “It’s probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you’re talking to the president, because what if he tells a funny joke and you laugh so hard you spit the toothpick out and it hits him in the face or something.”
Today I am grateful for: Temporary crowns
Guess the Movie: “I’m so happy that I am alive, in one piece and short. I’m in a world of shit, yes. But I am alive. And I am not afraid.” – Answer: Full Metal Jacket, 1987
BLOGGING FORWARD TO: tbird36 who writes so well and with so much love for a son that it just about tears your heart out.
End of Day – 9:02 pm
+ = Dentist created a fake crown this morning to plug up the hole where my crown broke off at the gumline.
- = Now I just have to eat only on the left side of my mouth for the next few weeks till I can get in to see the endodontic surgeon to do the completion of a root canal followed by surgery to lengthen the remaining tooth by cutting the gums back so a new crown can be attached. Sigh.